Friday, September 29, 2006

In A Perfect World............

Oh no. His friends etc know and we go out together in public etc. I meant I am just not getting too much into detail and don't want any outside comments to create any issues. Kind of like the media frenzy that would erupt if T.O. and I were to be dating. (haha) As a matter of fact we were all out last night in ATL since its a by week this week for them. Trust me I know the rules on that one. If you don't meet their friends/family its likely because you are not the one! My mom taught me that:). But really we aren't exclusive or anything at the moment. I think I am jaded from the last episode.

Your co-worker may be right:)! I have forced myself to start dating now so I dont get too attached to anyone person and although they all get on my nerves (some more than others) there are good points in each that in a perfect world I could use to create my very own perfect man:).

Let's see off to L.A. all next week to do my last run as a porn star. So hopefully things will go smoothly. There is even an orgy scene lined up.

Here's a thought can anyone believe I held onto the classifieds from Sun and actually looked through them!!!!! I don't know I may definitely be getting softer in my old age! I don't think this guy has anything to do with it either in case you were speculating. I think my wants, and needs have just shifted and gotten much simpler and I enjoy being at home lot now! What happened who knows. Maybe I am having the I am 30 episode. Ha Ha.

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Relationships

Now that college story is strange and I personally don't watch porn in groups with other women. Just not a turn on. If I am watching I am either just reviewing the movie or it is a preview to my own personal private 'real-life' scene:)!
One thing I have learned over the years as far as relationships go is to keep things private. He knows and no he is not married but I just don't want too many issues to arise. Its a difficult enough to accept as it is without all the nay-sayers dropping nay-says, ya know!:)

Actually my last long-term relationship was with a regular guy and he broke my heart. I find that they can not handle the comments from friend etc even if I was absolutely everything they dreamed of and more. I went out of my way to make sure he was taken care of and never felt neglected etc and one day his friend decided to have him read reviews and all of a sudden he did a complete 360 when it was 'I love you' just a few weeks before. I was angry, hurt, etc and still am so I am more than cautious nowadays when it come to relationships.

People have me all wrong. Cancers in general are family oriented nurturing people. I can not even tell you the last time I went out to a club (when it wasn't a paid appearance). I have been in Atlanta since Fri and I think I have left the house maybe 3 times. One to the gym, the grocery store and target. I usually spend Sat and Sun doing laundry, working out, and cooking for the week. I would love a regular guy that would accept me as is, support me in whatever it is I do or don't do, and be financially stable enough that if I need help now and then its not an issue. I am not seeking a sugar daddy although it would be nice just someone with at least a 6fig salary, open mind socially and sexually, over the age of 32 and pleasing on the eye. Is that too much to ask?:)

In the meantime I am trying out a new Blogcast that will notify subscribers when I update my blog. All you have to do is click on the link and subscribe http://feeds.feedburner.com/AyanaAngelsBlog

Let me know how it works for you. Also any other topics anyone would like to bring up feel free! Notice i am skipping right over week 3 in the NFL for now:) HAHA

Ayana