Decisions

Ok I have thought long and hard and talked it over with friends and family and the bottom line is this.......... My sudden retirement was mainly from irritation, anger, and frustration at a deal gone bad. If perhaps I had a laid out plan with set steps along the way it would have succeeded. I didn't. I am bored at home, tired of traveling to see clients, but I have had time to get myself together and that having been said I am going to continue to do videos for about 18months or until I finish a certification I am working on. I have built up a lifestyle that I am NOT willing to throw away just to please society. The team of friends, boyfriends, family etc that I have with me now are sincere and non-adult so they have no ulterior motives and respect me and whatever decision I go with and that is what I have decided. So there is an end but there is a method that will be followed so there will be no financial regrets. Plus the economy is shit right now and looking at the job market based on what I have on my resume is like what the hell.......!!!! I would lose it all and it would be like what was it all for. I have three friends right now that have been 'employed' for sometime now and with the exception of one were all living within their means but are still losing their houses.

And to those that want me to produce....at the moment I have no desire to shoot my own videos because I have no desire to live in LA and it just doesn't translate the same when not there unless you have 7 figure capital to set yourself up like the wonderful people at Score Group in Miami or Bang Bros in Miami. Who knows maybe I will retire and enter into entertainment that way but for now..........I am not ready to eat beans and rice after having sushi and lobster for so long at will!!!! Since most true porn stars have somewhere like 250+ titles and I may be at around 110-115 at best I am good there as well. Ideally a contract would be nice because I have never been one to shoot with just everyone and that will not change now:)!!


On another note a friend and I were discussing something that he says bothers women. He had a woman he was dating ask him how many people he had slept with in his life-time. I was shocked that would even matter especially to a woman. But when he told her apparently she was shocked an appalled. (his #s rival mine I'm sure) But my ??? of the week is would you ask your lover/boy/girl friend this question. And if so what does it matter? What does it show or prove is one has more or less than the other person????