Ok Ok for those who are interested I did give the movie guy a 2nd opportunity and we did go to the movies and saw Borne Ultimatum and for all those I have fallen asleep on you already know what happened. Midway through the movie I was asleep and could not snap out of it. I thought he was pretty nice about the whole thing and found it ironic since I gave him grief over the whole movies in the 1st place. So we agree to a 2nd date where he is going to barbecue ribs etc, we'll watch a movie, and I'll play bartender. Now I will just say this...always trust your 1st instincts. I said he was selfish and had motives from the beginning and they came out this evening.
I must give the guy credit the food was great which is why I proceeded to have 2 plates:). He does have ADD because the 1st movie he put in looked great but had subtitles so he can't sit and watch the screen the whole time (huh??). So then he puts in another one. That movie is pretty good. So now its a little cool I ask for a blanket and a pillow and the next thing you know I am in a deep food induced coma. Sorry but it happens and if you date me it will happen often but its not like I do it on purpose! So I wake up to him hitting me (not hard) on the leg telling me "to wake the hell up you are not supposed to be sleeping"!!! Ok now I don't know about you but this pissed me off completely. I tried to stay awake but damn am I missing something??? Then he does it again and then wants a hug. Can he get some attention 'in his own house' What????? After you are beating me awake you think you are going to 'make out' that wasn't going to happen anyway. I don't know how many times I have to say this. In the regular world you will not get anything easy and the 2nd date???? So now I am wide awake and irritated at this display and I'm ready to go home. It must have hit him because he asks if I was mad at him and then proceeds to call me on the way home and wants to make another date. Uhhh!!!NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lets backtrack to the Falcons/Ravens game Fri night. Season tickets lower, level 1st row 20 yard line. Had a date and this guy I go out with frequently and actually like. Had to pick him up which already irritated me because I had to pass the GA Dome and go way to the other side of town and then would be late for the game and stuck in traffic. But I did it for the good of the game! When I get to that side of town I may have been snippy because I need directions and I am in rush because the game has now started. Instead of just giving me the directions so we can go he is talking all slow and I am getting frustrated. Don't know if he was high, drunk, half asleep or what. So I proceed to ask if he does not know where he lives. Which caused him to go into ghetto flip mode and call me "Shawty" which I can not stand, followed with the "My n***a" etc etc and then after his tantrum he decides he is in no mood for the game? What the fuck???!!! You better snap out of that shit because you are wasting my $$, my tix, and my time (by now the sky has let out and its pouring rain and its almost the 2nd 1/4). But he did not and it was too late to call on other possibilities. Then to top it off the game was great and went into overtime!!!!!! So I tell you all this to say it is Gay and Lesbian weekend in ATL and I am on the hunt for Ms. Right because Mr. is not available at this time!!!!!!!
NFL Picks to Follow......................
Go Canes!!!!!!!!!!
To answer Chris's question. There are no rules when its comes to women. I don't date girls in the traditional sense. With women I am friends like girlfriends are normally and that leads to sex. It can be in the 1st night or whenever it presents itself. But women are not always chomping at the bit for it. And you're right he may just be a guy that wants some but I believe that those that know of my background expect sex or think its going to come faster than a regular chick and its not that way. But to hit me awake so you can attempt to get some.....I am not feeling warm and fuzy about that at all. I don't see falling asleep as disrespectful. If you're tired its a natural function. I have had dates fall asleep in the movies etc and I assure you I didn't beat them to keep them awake. I understood that perhaps they had a lot on their plate but rather than break the date they made the effort to be there.
And in response to DJKB I don't think I am arrogant I just don't need to be with anyone. I may want to date etc but I will live if I don't that having been said I just don't feel like I have to put it with anything I don't feel like. If that is the definition of arrogant I guess I am. I just have a very take it or leave it attitude. If you have been on the scene awhile I am more than willing to compromise etc. It's funny because every woman I ran these dates by all said the 1st one was selfish as hell and obviously wanted to fuck and the second had a tantrum. Its funny have different we see things as men and women. Those were his exact words but trust me when I tell you it was obvious where he was headed with that. I gave him a hug and kisses when I came in the door why do you suddenly need them now that I am made you beat me awake:) I am a souther woman and I expect southern gentlemen treatment and until I get it I am not settling for this hip-hop bullshit that is out there. I have plenty of male friends if I want to go out or party or even fuck but its the combination of all those that I want.
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6 comments:
Two plates, followed by the itis!?! You're too funny. Gay or straight, maybe you should maintain a strict don't eat or no movie policy if is't going to have that effect on you. As far as the 'shawty' comment I guess I can sympathize with you on that one. But this was supposed to be someone that you liked and had been out with several times before right? I guess for some reason he was able to keep that side of himself hidden from you in some way. Oh well back to the drawing board for you.
Wow I am tripping off of this. Is this how it went word for word? Ayana maybe you should get with a lady because from what I see, you are not good with the brothers at all. I don't know of any woman that I met for the first time that would have allowed me to fall asleep on the first or second date. I don't care how many drinks or how much food I ate. That was so disrespectful falling asleep.
Secondly all he asked was for a hug (what I read in your post). Now any man be it because you are a former pornstar or just because you are beautiful as hell because you are, would think about sex on the first date. Hey any man that says he does not have sex on the mind on a regular basis is not telling the truth. Now saying all of this, asking for a hug does not mean he expects anything else. Maybe he was hoping but most of us know not to expect sex on the first or second date most of the time. I think you are totally tripping on this guy.
Now the other guy was probably wrong in the way he called you shawty after you two got mad but damn Ayana if you did not want to pick him up then you should have gotten another date from a guy that was closer to you. Why trip on him by asking if he knew where he lived because you was missing the game. Did you leave in plenty of time to go to the game? Was it his fault that you was running late? If so, then you should have took the ticket and went to the game and sold it or gave it away there. Hey maybe it is not the man but it is you? You ever thought about that? So many women always want to put it on the man, like they can do no wrong. You need to humble yourself. Ayana no one is perfect not even you but I have to admitt that a lot of times you come off as arrogant. I don't know what happened in your past when it comes to men but you need to show the men in your life now more respect if they are respecting you as well. Hey remember these men are taking time out to spend with you as well. You women need to understand we have lives as well and it is a honor to be out with us too
Ayana, I think the world of you, but, I'm starting to think you are the date from hell. You fall asleep on both dates and he's in the wrong? Let's say he fell asleep, how would you feel about that situation. Just my opinion but I think you make to much of it about a man trying to get sexual with you early in dating. You are forgetting we are men, we at least have to try to hit it, wouldn't you feel offended if we didn't try and most of the time we know we won't get any, but we still have to test the waters. Getting back to this guy you kept falling asleep on. He probably felt that you were at a comfort level with him to the point where you were at his place, he feed you, then you felt comfortable enough to take a nap. Hell, I probably would have tried to wake you up also and believe it or not these guys don't see the porn star when they look at you, they probably see the same thing I see, an incredibly beautiful and fine woman who is irresistable and like most men want to have sex with you. But please stop thinking all men want to have sex with you just because they may know you were a porn star. We are men we just want to have sex, especially if the woman is gorgeous. Question for you. Do you feel that if you have sex with a man in the early stages of dating that would make a negative statement about you? I hope you find what your looking for. One more question. Does the same sexual rules apply for women, do they have to work hard to get some from you?
I agree with Chris maybe you are the Hell date; just kidding. Ayana do you realize that there is a lot of pressure on the guys you date also. A guy may really like you but may be a little tenative at first, because of your past, but at the same time if he knows and make the decision to date you he has to be able to handle your dating rules and all other stipulations of being with you. I on the other hand would have been a little more romantic in waking you, maybe something like a nice passionate kiss to wake you up, which maybe could lead into something more. I agree, him beating you awake and then asking for a hug was a little suspicious, if all he wanted was a hug, why not wait until you wakeup. Ayana, would honesty from the man work out differently for you. Let's say if he told you he's aware of your sexual history and let it be known that he's interested in being sexual with you not because of your past but because he is physically attracted to you and hopefully sex between the two of you will strenghten the bond that the two of you are developing. Would that work with you? I find it interesting that your standards with men are for more stricker than for women. Honestly, Ayana, if you meet a man that doesn't have sex on the mind and you are interested in him you better jump the broom with him asap. In my opinion and remember this is just my opinion and not judgement. I think you condemn any chances of things working with you and this guy because from you very first posting of this guy there were statements of suspicion, and hidden motives. I believe you never fully trusted whether he wanted you or Ayana, therfore you always had doubts and stayed very guarded about his true interest. I think it's wonderful that you don't just submit yourself to any man just because you are a part of the sex industry, but at the same time you have to learn to be just a little more trusting and like previous posters mentioned you are a beautiful woman and I'm sure that most men are attracted to that more than the fact you were once a pornstar. I think you should ask some of your gorgeous female friends who aren't a part of the adult industry about some of the wierd sexual attempts they received from men, it may help you to realize we as men just want some sex and we will lie and degrade ourselves sometimes to get it. I don't feel you are arrogant, but I do feel from your posting that you are very on guard. Sometimes to find all the things you want out of a man you have to look beneath your standards and sacrifice some things to achieve the results you seek. Don't give up on the brothers Ayana, although you like women, I really feel in your heart you want the American Dream with a man. Stay true to yourself and don't be afraid to trust and everything will eventually work for you. Goodluck
Ayana I am not mad at you the problem is you probably are dating guys who are not secure and do not have really their own interest. Please do me a favor date a real man who handles his business and then you will not have those problems. He should have let you sleep as long as you wanted to and I am sure if he did you probably would have been appreciative and not been pissed off. Also, he should have took the fact that you got Negroitis after two plates as a compliment. As for "Shawte" you really might want to date someone a little different. Get off then GA boys and date those Florida boys by way of Texas.
to Ayana. To be honest, where are you finding these losers at, I keep being told down south is real people and and everyone cool and this and that but it seems like the same shit but different day. You very beautiful and guys are imtimdated by you of course but your given the wrong kat the wrong opportunity to be with you, this milwaukee loves AYANA(lol) but the bottom line dating is very overrated and, but fallin alseep in the movie thearthe was kinda wrong and I would of been really salty, and would ending the date immedialtely. but then again we would of done something cooler than the movie anyway.
Kisses RJ
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